"There was a crooked man and he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence upon a crooked stile.
He bought a crooked cat, which caught a crooked mouse
And they all lived together in a little crooked house that he bought with a secret loan from a millionaire chum that he didn't declare to his mortgage lender because he's a sleazy prick who thinks he's better than you."
More at The Daily Mash.
OK, here's another:
"One, two buckle my shoeNow go and read the rest at The Daily Mash.
Three, four, knock at the door
Five, seven is it? I'm sorry, I went to a state school that felt that arithmetic was not as important as teaching me about lesbians and socialism."
... and the crooked man went on his holidays with a crooked oligarch on a crooked yacht...
ReplyDelete"one, two, buckle my shoe"... Yes, point taken. But you still need to be able to count, so you know exactly how many lesbians you're in bed with. Now there's a thought...