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Friday 8 May 2009

The car business satirised

Yes, it's The Daily Mash on Fiat's takeover of Vauxhall and maybe General Motors.

"ITALIAN car maker Fiat has unveiled plans to take over Vaxuhall, insisting the British-made cars are still not quite rusty and unreliable enough.

Fiat wants to buy General Motors' UK and German brands to a create a new pan-European third-rate car giant to compete with the likes of Volkswagen in its dreams.

...

Fiat pointed to its strong track record in rescuing troubled manufacturers. Alfa Romeo now makes stylish cars that are bought by discerning drivers who appreciate good design but have no desire to go anywhere, while Lancia has not sold a new car since 1977.

Meanwhile Fiat is also hoping to acquire the US giant Chrysler with a view to integrating its staggeringly unsuccessful technology and useless design know-how into its inexplicable strategy."

Masterful...

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