The Douchebag Delta Force

Iowahawk has excelled with this piece of satire, or is it factual reporting? The premise -

"With new polls showing Barack Obama's once-commanding lead over John McCain all but evaporated, the Obama campaign announced today it has begun deploying its vast volunteer army of downtown hipster douchebags to help reconnect the presumptive Democratic candidate with middle-American voters."

The force -

"Highly motivated, and with skills ranging from post-modern gender theory to espresso cafe blackboard chalk art, the volunteers were eager to get to work on the campaign trail. But before deployment Obama officials insisted that all recruits undergo an intensive training regimen to prepare them for the rigors of life in Red Country... "We tell them straight up: we aren't your mommy or daddy or your au pair. There aren't any independent lesbian film festivals in Youngstown, and just because Iowa has a lot of farmers it doesn't mean they are going to see a lot of Sunday chill-out farmers' markets," says Voorhees. "After that shock wears off, we tell them about how the natives drink Pabst unironically.""

Some of the tactics -

"According to Lorenz, winning back fence sitters to the Obama column takes a disciplined three-pronged attack of sarcasm, irony and condescension, which he demonstrates on a diner at a Fond du Lac IHOP.

"Excuse me, who are you voting for?" Lorenz asks the elderly man.

"Oh, I don't know, McCain I suppose," the man answers.

"Yeah, I guess you senile old fucks need to stick together," says Lorenz. "That way you can stay safe from those scary Muslim nee-groos."

"See?" observes Lorenz. "Now that he's been properly shamed out of his racism, he'll think twice before pulling any lever for McBush.""

...

"Occasionally I will run into a McBush supporter, and I will pull out two campaign posters and let them compare," she explains. "Obama: Shepard Fairey. McCain: Copperplate Gothic. Then I ask them - are you really going to vote for someone that out of touch with graphic design trends?""

Will it work? -

"Whether Obama's douchebag heartland surge will ultimately succeed remains to be determined, but longtime political analyst and What's the Matter With Kansas? author Thomas Frank thinks the basic strategy is sound.

"Unfortunately this election comes down to winning the hearts and minds of whitebread, middlebrow, middle-class, middle-Americans," says Frank."This effort shows that Obama troops are willing to reach out and condescend to them, one-on-one, no matter how pathetic and stupid they are." "

Genius, sheer genius.